How to Make Friends as an Adult
Something I’ve been hearing a lot of people talk about recently is the challenge of making friends as an adult. When you’re a child, it’s easy. You go up to someone on the playground and say, “hey, do you want [...]
Why Sex is Different Than Broccoli
Sex therapist Marty Klein is an incredibly good speaker. He’s an excellent writer (and you should seriously consider getting your hands on a copy of his book Sexual Intelligence), but his speaking is absolutely unparalleled. That’s why when I was [...]
Loneliness and Online Harassment
Maybe it’s because I’ve been rereading Daring Greatly by Brené Brown, but the above discomforting interaction led me to think a lot about vulnerability, connection, and loneliness. Let me explain. I have two profiles on Facebook. One, which I’ve been [...]
The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic
Why Your Partner Clams Up or Runs Away From Conflict (or why you do!) I want you to imagine that you’re at a cocktail party, and you’re talking with someone you have just met. As people naturally do, you stand [...]
8 Ways to Support Someone Who is Contemplating Suicide
Trigger warning: frank discussion of suicide. The first time someone told me he was planning to kill himself, I was a sophomore in high school. I had met Freddy (name changed), who lived in Florida, one time through a [...]
The “ Into the Woods ” Phenomenon
How to Balance Big Dreams and Realistic Expectations Note: This article contains some minor spoilers for the musical and movie “ Into the Woods ”. When I was very young, Stephen Sondheim released a new Broadway musical called Into [...]
Using Gamification to Improve Your Life
“And snap! The job’s a game!” -Mary Poppins The first time I ever used the concept of gaming and leveling up in a therapy session, I had never heard the word “gamification”. All I knew was that the client sitting [...]
Why I’m Reducing My Facebook Use in 2016 – And You Should Too
This morning, I left my home to discover that it was raining hard. If you’re reading this from a different region of the country, you might be wondering why that’s even noteworthy, but for those of us in Southern California, [...]
New Year’s Resolutions and SMART Goals
Here are some New Year’s Resolutions excerpted from a long list I made in 2008: I will floss more. I will exercise regularly and eat well in order to lose weight. I will maintain optimism in the face of adversity [...]
An Annual Performance Review for Your Relationship
“Most couples enter therapy 8 years too late.” I don’t know if this is true or if it’s an exaggeration, but it’s conventional wisdom I’ve heard repeated time and time again in the field of relationship counseling. Whether the number [...]